Turkey 3 : Beginning of the long bus ride....

So far in my journey to the west, I've survived Witches of the Western Skies....only to be surrounded by big bullies in military fatigues and guns.

After enduring a few agonizingly boring hours at the gas chamber, it was quite a relieve to be able to face the Uzbekistan Airway's flight attendants again. Once seated, my brains instantly started thinking up possibilities of how to defy and win over the Witches of th.....wait a minute, my be my crazy imagination but...these stewardesses are thin!! And one of them actually spoke and smiled!!!

ショック！！！
（SHOCK!!!)

The in-flight service this time was very good....surprisingly disappointing. I was anticipating a horrible service but they manage to give me a decent service with a few smiles and the usual "Coffee or Tea", then gently settling them down on my tray. Because of their good service, I have nothing else to write here about them....craps....
Allow me to correct myself here. Ehem...Uzbekistan Airways isn't all rotten eggs and sour fruits.....they have pretty good service too. =)

Anyway, we reached Istanbul, Turkey a few hours later. Met up with our local tour guide, Mr. Atilla. He was quite a plump fellow....a good man though. At first, he was a pleasant presence...but he later turn out to be the most irritating piece of lard on the bus. Shall talk about him more in later chapters...


Yup, Atilla is the fat, balding nice looking old man...


The local tour company that we engaged in...

When we got to the bus, all of us walked on the left side of the bus in order to board the bus. Was quite confused at first as there was no door...took me a while to realize that they drive on the right side in Turkey.


In case you are wondering, only us Malaysians took photo of the bus...door-on-the-right bus failed to impress the Japanese.

I'll just cut the crap and show pictures here...


Turkey seems to have a lot of flats around. Well, exactly the term "pigeon hole"(Americans call them that)....just that no pigeons, but turkeys live in them.


Streets of Istanbul....


The city is surprisingly flat....buildings stretching across the horizon. Interesting thing that they don't go beyond 4,5 storeys high.


No, this is not a school nor a government building. They just have flags everywhere...is it the law? To me it's just plain narcissism...



Amidst new buildings, old ruins of the Roman times still remains...above is the walls of Constantinople and the Aqueducts.


We headed to a restaurant which was directly under the old walls....


1st meal in Turkey. Tomato soup and bread..


Next was some kind of grilled fish, chips and rice...

The thing about food culture in Turkey, they come in 3 courses. Starters is always soup, bread and salad. Then the main, which is rice with meat....as for areas near the sea, fish. Last will be dessert. Interesting that they eat both bread and rice....both must be their staple food. As expected of a country where "East meets West". Here I want to do a special mention of their rice...they don't cook plain white rice, it's always rice with some kind of spice or beans. Very fragrant and nice. Best rice I've ever had in my life...

After the meal was the beginning of our very very long ride on the bus.....about 6 hours...maybe more. Sigh....and that's when we found out what's Mr. Atilla's "special talent" is....tell you more soon.

Turkey 2 : Enter the Refugee Camp.

Fellow readers...very sorry for not updating....You see, The Uzbekistan Government found out that I've been writing bad stuff about them. So, they hacked into Japan's Utility system and cut off electricity and internet connection to my room last Friday till today. I had to suffer living without internet for 3 days and one whole day without heat and light....

Bloody Uzbek's...that's not gonna stop me!! I'm writing more about you!! BWAH HAH HAA HA ....

Ehem.....now, where was I?

Ah, yes...the witches....as if to complement the bad in-flight service, the pilot gave the worst landing I've ever experience in my life. He landed...I think he landed like the way the food was dumped on my tray. As long as my history of flying, never once I felt the fear of crashing until...well, until the pilot made touchdown at Tashkent, Uzbekistan.

Man...was I glad to step on firm ground again after the rough ride I had. But that relieve lasted only for a while as it dreaded me to think that I'm there for transfer and I have to board the same plane again to get to Turkey! Sigh...

"You can only stay warm for so long when you pee in your pants"

Anyway, as soon as we touched down, we were all herded into a little ass bus to be transported to the Customs. They don't seem to have a proper walkway that connects the plane to the main building...they use shuttle bus. Hehe....pity them Japanese passengers who were not used to all this. Most of them were complaining all the way to the main buliding..

First impression I got when I got off the little ass bus was...Wow. They actually have a proper building!! Photography was not allowed so no picture here...but the building looked somewhat like European architecture...tall, wide pillars made of marble supporting a tiled roof. And so I thought..."Wow, not bad for Uzbekistan...after all I've heard and read about this country!" But suddenly, I heard the sound of padlocks locking behind me....turned around to find a tall, unsmilling military personnel locking the doors behind me!! And in front of me, passports were being inspected and people were being led into some hall.....Shit!! We were all being led to the gas chambers!!

NOOooooo........

"Show them your passport, then you can go in and rest while waiting for our plane to ready."....said a smiling bottle of soy sauce(remember soy sauce? mentioned her in my first previous ...she's our guide's nickname). And at once I calmed down....wow, she really is a good person. She actually sensed our anxiety and came over to talk to us....yeah, you could say that she was the lone loving angel in the devil's den. I think that's the time when Chin Wooi fell in love with her.

Had my passport processed by another unsmiling, rude chap. Made me wonder, were they all sent to a special camp where they had to throw away all their humane instincts, then trained to be rude and bitter...then only can they be flight attendant,/customs official/etc...Well, either that or they were ordered not to smile and be friendly or else be shot.


The halls....looks like everyone got gassed, right?


Are they....dead? Were they the first to gassed, then left to rot and infect us with some terrible plague? Are they....darn, just sleeping.....haiya....what an anticlimax.

Entered the halls, the atmosphere was....it's just so gawd damn depressing! No one spoke anything, tired folks sleeping all over on the floor...all the officials had the look like they want to kill me or just beat me up for fun. First time I've ever entered a place like this and it's all quite shocking and uneasy....makes even a graveyard look warm and inviting.

About the folks who were there, I realised that there were a lot of Punjabis around....hmm, India must be nearby!(here you can either marvel at my geography or just laugh at my stupidity). Anyway, someone was playing some Punjab song on the radio....hah, nice try to cheer up the atmosphere, but too bad there are no banana tree nearby to dance around.


Says.."HAVE A GOOD FLIGHT"...haha, at least the Uzbeks syill have a sense of humour.

After waiting a depressing 3/4 hours, we got our boarding passes and headed to board the plane. Yes, the little ass bus ride to the plane once again. We reached the plane only to be greeted by a few soldiers wielding AK-47, MP5 Navy and an unsmiling guy dressed up like a secret service agent holding a walkie talkie....


See that guy in his fatigues? looks like he's planning to hijack the plane....

The Japanese, having slept in the gas chambers, were fully awake by this time and each one of them instinctively reached for their cameras and proceeded to take a picture of the unsmiling military personnel and plane....they were seriously warned by some red-faced frowning guy....photography prohibited. Pity the Japanese who were denied the very thing they were borned to do......unable to take ant picture, could easily see that most of them are not used to the situation. Even I am not used to the situation, I mean, who places military personnel with machine guns and secret service agent before a plane? Freaks!!

Hmm...maybe they received news of a crappious blogger and wanted to apprehend that guy before he does any damage......GASP!! Must warn him...

Turkey 1 : Journey to the West

"In order to reach heaven, one must first journey through hell."

Ever heard that phrase? No? Well, you can quote me on that!

I know most of you have heard of the ancient Chinese tale "Journey through the West". The story about a monk, a monkey, a pig and a water demon who journeyed to the west to search for a scroll of some sort. And in their journey, they met all kinds of demons and beasts which tried to kill, seduce, eat them. Me, being a proud Chinese who can only command simple Mandarin and an even simpler Cantonese, decided to follow the holy monk's work and undergo a journey of my own.

My journey to the west took me to the far away lands of Turkey, home of kebab and belly dancers. Along with me on this sacred journey are...


From left:
Me, misunderstood for being a tough scary guy all the time..
Loke Eng, had a sore throat, lost his voice and had to suffer my cruel jokes..
Li Jia, burps more times than I could count...
Keong, his hair was longer than LJ...
Ming Rong, always complaining than someone cheated him of 1 YTL(Turkish money)
Fong Zyin, all turks find her pretty....
Chin Wooi, thanks god that people don't eat pork in Turkey. However, it is unknown which god that he thanked...
Not in pic:
Lo, likes his trademark wool-covers-the-eyes pose...
Boon, everyone finds him "cute". Lee-chan kawaiiiii!!!


Anyway, the whole trip started with us being typical Malaysians....yup, we were late for the gathering. Our first words from our tour guide, Ms. Kumagaya was "Please be on time as you will delay the whole group." It was kind of a good thing....I mean I can't think of any better way to start our trip.
FYI, the tour guide shall be called "Soy Sauce", as named by Chin Wooi who fell in love with Soy Sauce.


The witch of the western skies....here you see her in action terrorizing someone.

We took Uzbekistan Airways for our journey to Turkey. Just like the old Chinese tale, we had our own share of demons and devils. Just like the pic above, we had terrible witches of the western skies to terrorize us. Forgive me for being too harsh here but they are old, fat, and unattractive...compared to the cabin crew of Malaysian Airlines or Japan Airlines, I couldn't help but criticize. And they were rude too!!

Once when I was sleeping, they roughly threw earphones on my body. Just like that, BAM! i woke up to find two earphones on my body. Can't they at least leave me in peace and give me those earphones later? Plus, the damn audio were in Uzbek's!!...rudely awaken from my peaceful sleep just to find earphones for me to jack into some language I can't understand!! .....and apparently that's not the only way they wake passengers up. They are so fat that their humongous ass will brush your shoulders as they try to squeeze through the aisle. Not to mention that the stomps their heavy feet produce are louder than the sound the jet engine produces. Sigh...someone need to remind them why air stewardess needs to be thin.

One word...HAG!!! Pity on all the men in Uzbekistan...

But wait...that's not it. When it's time for meal....they....are they unable to speak? Do they have to dump the food on my tray? Can't they at least set it nicely on the tray?

You see, when it's time for serving food, they don't ask the usual "Fish or Meat?" .....they just mention "FISH!" or "MEAT!!"...then they dump the food on your tray. If you are thinking "Don't we get to choose??"....exactly that. It's as if they were given the privilege to make the decision for you. Same thing goes for beverage. They just go round saying "Tea! ....Tea!" and roughly pour some watered down tea in your cup. If you want coffee, you have to hide your cups away from them, shake your head vigourously like a rattlesnake's tail and say "Coffee!" a few times....

Worst when they collect the pillows and blankets....I witnessed with my own two unbelieving eyes how they snatched away blankets from unsuspecting, sleeping passengers. Boon, he tried to hide one of the pillows but the witches' power were too great for him. Once again.....to all my readers, let's be in a moment of silence for about a minute....give those men of Uzbekistan your sincerest pity.

For those who don't believe in witches....BELIEVE IT!!

I Graduated!!

Finally! Three long years of studies to gain a lame diploma has finally ended. Since I've graduated from college....I think I'll come clean and be honest and tell what I truly felt through this 3 years ordeal.

No...I never really liked or rejoiced on my decision to study in Japan. I wouldn't exactly call my life here a living hell, but it's sure as hell isn't heaven either. Back when I was young, I've always dreamed that college life would be a place of intellect...a place where people go to to gain maturity, breaking away from all those bullshit childishness of high school life. Much to my disappointment, I found myself once again surrounded by loud, rowdy brats that were to be my classmates.... always laughing at the stupidest of jokes. I know I can't blame them as they were 17 years old at that time(I was 20), but I can't help feeling that I was rejected the sense of maturity and thrown into the shameful pit of immaturity.

Yes....I don't deny that coming to Japan has allowed me many meaningful things. Among those were learning a new language, knowing a new culture, dropping my Manglish slang (the lah...lor...mah...meh...why like that one...). I also got to go overseas...namely Korea and Turkey(will be blogging about it soon). All those I achieved during the long holidays, but back in the classroom, I will once again feel suffocated by the "children" around me. Never able to be blend in and adapt, I kept to myself and ended up not having any close friends. Many of you know me to be a person with many crazy ideas and jokes but those were when I'm outside the lecture hall...not on any works that require the mind. But know this that I can be quite serious when I'm needed to. If you want to know what's my nickname here...it's "おっさん" or "Uncle". It was given to me as I frequently refuse joining the brats in doing crazy stuff during lectures.

So....yeah...life was pretty boring for me. And since I didn't like my life here, I also didn't excel in my studies...finding no purpose nor reason to drive me. Many times where I just felt like letting loose of everything... but fortunately for me I met my senior MGS girl. She never knew how much she really meant to me...nor have I told anyone anyway. She have done a lot for me by just being around. So...thanks yo....hope to enjoy another year with you in Nagaoka University. Just for the record, she isn't the main reason I chose there.

So here I am....graduated with a diploma and now looking forward to my university life. Hope that I can get what I came here for in Nagaoka University.

Anyway....I mentioned that I graduated, right? Here's a few pics from my graduation ceremony.


Sawada Yayoi....girl that I liked but unfortunately had a boyfriend. Sigh...such luck I have.


Takano Shiho...girl who was my partner for research.


No...I didn't ask them to line up according to height but it somehow happen....hehe


The bunch that I was closest with....see that girl on the top left? She has a voice of a squeaky little mouse but have a body that will melt the iceberg that sunk Titanic.


Guys that I sometimes hung out with...


Everyone giving weak claps as we descended down the stairs.


If you are looking for photos of me receiving the certificate.....there are none. They sent one representative to receive on everyones behalf....cheapskate!


My diploma......just wondering, can I get any jobs in Malaysia with this?

After the official ceremony, we had a party in some hotel.....


The Dean giving some speech.....


Sushis and sandwiches....it was DELICI....nah, it was cold and tasted horrible.


Kikuchi...he's from another class. The one guy that wasn't childish.

And after that party, we had another small one among ourselves (same faculty)...


Steamboat and hotplate pork....tasted DELICIOUS!! Damn...shouldn't have ate at the hotel.


Had beer and sake...not orange juice like the party at the hotel.


Beer and sake also means drunks....this girl was so wasted that she kissed me on the cheek when I asked for a picture. Normally, she's the serious kind with little if no nonsense....always walking straight like she have a iron rod propped behind her hack. She usually refuse having her picture taken but this time she's the one who initiated. Told me "Randy, you are so handsome and cool, I think I fell in love".......gave me the coldest shiver down my spine.


The party was also an opportunity for us to say our thanks to dear lecturers and friends...

And that was it. My life as a college student officially ended. Some guys cried that night and one of them hugged me tight as he cried into my chest...saying how much he appreciated me and all. For that moment, he made me feel as if I was appreciated and accepted in the class....made me feel that it was worth it coming to Japan.

Sigh....maybe it was just me feeling insecure. Maybe, I had friends who liked me, cared for me....maybe....but i guess it's a little late to be regretting my past three years.

I hope....really do hope that a good life will be awaiting me once I move to the new University...

Ski at Fukushima

Yesterday was a field trip organized especially for foreign students(a.k.a Aliens) in my college who are going to graduate this 14th. It's like a farewell gift for us...well, sort of.

The original plan was to take us Aliens to cultural sites of Japan....something like "Lawatan sambil belajar". Well, It is a good thing to know more about Japanese culture....but I've been here for 3 years! I've seen my share of Shrines and wooden houses with straw mats for flooring.....and I'm bored of it!! Just in case you are wondering about Japanese sub-culture, there was no way the Aliens supervisor was going to take us to the "hanky-panky" girls-in-various-costumes Museum.

So I suggested....

Me : Instead of going to those boring places, why not go for a ski trip?
Aliens supervisor: Hmm...give me 3 reasons why.
Me: One reason is good enough. I want to go.
Aliens supervisor: I said 3 reasons.
Me: Okay, there are no snow in my country. And that makes skiing a part of culture exchange too!
Aliens supervisor: Sigh...alright. Ski it is. to be honest, I wanted to go skiing too!!

And that was it. College trip plans changed. Aliens conquered humans in Japan.

Anyway, for the ski resort, we went to Fukushima, somewhere north of where I am, Ibaraki, which is somewhere north east of Tokyo, which is very very much faraway north east of Kuala Lumpur.

The day started with a 3 hour bus ride to Hotel Listel, the hotel that we stayed at. Didn't occur to me to take photos of the hotel at that time....but I did take some pictures when I'm inside...


View from the hotel room overlooking Lake Inawashiro...

Bunch of 15, 16 year olds....they made a point of avoiding me by standing in the furthest corner and huddling together....typical behavior when facing a predator such as me.


18 year olds. I like the one on the right....made a mistake of telling her she was pretty during my first year in Japan. The term should have been "cute". Damn....

The guys...well, one of them is a girl. Can you guess which?


Seafood pilaf for lunch....if you think that the arrangement of the spoon is weird, that's because it was me who arranged it.


After lunch was the main event. Time to eat fresh snow for dessert. Everyone you see in the picture above are beginners. The ones who have experience was me and Alien supervisor only....but Alien supervisor arranged instructors for them so....yeah, everybody had fun.

Ah....the feel of wind against my face as I glide effortlessly down the mountain. The feel of the ski board straining as I make a tight turn round a corner. The look of frighten small kids as I raced towards them at high speed.... Makes me wish that Malaysia have snow too...

Later that night, there was some illuminations on display in front of the hotel, so I invited the girls out for walks....ehem, invited guys as well but turns out that girls were more sporting than guys....8 girls and 3 guys turned up for the walk. Too bad for the rest of them, I get "the bigger piece of pie" so...good for me.


Santa already preparing for next year's Christmas. This proves how hardworking and efficient Japanese can be.


Plastic Santa was so happy to see me it grew organic limbs!!


Tricked two girls to imprint their body line on the snow.....nah, just kidding, didn't trick them, I just shoved them into the snow and jumped in after taking this picture.


The same two girls now expressing their love for me.....


Had a lot of fun that night...as a matter of fact, I had more fun that night than the ski itself! The girls were so crazy that they infected me with their "youngness" and suddenly I was among them rolling on the snow, running across empty fields, climbing statues...damn, it's good to be young again.

All in all, it was a fun trip although everyone was having too focused on skiing despite the fact that it was a farewell trip for us Aliens who are going to graduate soon....or did they mistook me to be a "Young Alien" instead of "Old Alien going away"? Hmm....don't know if I should be happy or sad with either answer.