Good news or bad news??

Wow Kelly...the bugs start chirping already? Thank god I live in Ibaraki....we don't have that noisy bug here, or at least not yet. I've always wondered, what do the environmentalists think of them? Them who always "preserve trees, save nature from mankind". Will they change their mind about trees that harbour a legion of noisy bugs that god created to irritate humans during summer or not....

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Just in case you're wondering, my exams is not over. It's just that a recent news highlight caught my attention and my fingers are just itching to comment about them.

Have you guys read the news about the flight to Kota Kinabalu that got canceled due to 'mechanical problem'?? Well, it was a MAS flight that Transport Minister Datuk Seri Chan Kong Choy was supposed to be on. When I first read it, it seemed to be just a random piece of news. But then suddenly, I thought "What are the odds that the ONLY flight canceled, or the only one reported in the news (which only serve to point out how significant a domestic flight was to be headline in the international papers) was the flight that our dear Transport Minister was on??" Being a Malaysian who's used to all kinds of mischiefs....I did my own little investigation.

You see, a few days before that delay, MAS announce that they will be giving one month bonus to their employees.....but what they failed to mention was that the bonus was to be given ONLY to 'selected employees'. Of course this unsurprisingly irked those who were excluded from the money list. So, according to my brother, who were supposed to serve on that flight.....it wasn't a mechanical fault, they deliberately delayed that flight!!

So, the mechanics were like.....

"Aww...it looks like we might have a screw loose on this one plane our Transport Minister is getting on. We, the dedicated mechanics can't shirk our duties and we must make sure this flight is save. We won't want our dear minister to be involved in an airplane crash now do we? Ali and Abu, you guys go on and check the rest of the plane...the rest of us are going out to buy karipap and teh tarik." And they took 4 hours to check that plane!!!

Well, what happened next was the announcement that ALL MAS EMPLOYEES are getting their bonus. All following flights were on schedule after that. Hahaha....good old Malaysians. Always getting our way. Congratulations to my brother too for getting his bonus.

But what really interest me is that in the international news, our dear Transport Minister actually lauded their actions. Now, since when did a Chinese minister ever praised a delayed flight before? And not only that, the newspaper here in Japan always report good stuff about MAS...how diligent and productive they are under the administration of Idris Jala.

WOW...journalist in Malaysia must be damn good in their job!!!!

EXAMSS!!!!

That is all...

Japan, Land of Rising sun...rising wave and earth as well...did I mention wind? Well, rain too....

Well Kelly, I guess so....everyone's a sucker. The only difference was that I realised that later than anyone else. Wait....if...if everyone's a sucker, then that also means that no one is, right? Yeah, I guess so too. And uhh...just in case you got insulted by me calling you a sucker..well, I'm sorry you're a sucker as well. hahaha...

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After going through what I went through these few days, I've yet drawn another conclusion on Japan. Either God really hate Japanese or that japanese happened to draw the short straw when choosing place to create a settlement.

Why do I say that? Well, Japan happen to be the most natural disaster prone in the world...well, other than the Bermuda Triangle of course, but that's in the middle of the ocean so that don't really count. These last few days I...well, we students in Japan had to face the typhoon. And when at long last the winds and rain died, it followed with an earthquake for an encore.

Now, anybody who had experienced typhoon would tell you that it's more than just having a standing fan turned on full blast while someone shoots at you with a water gun. It's more like winds bearing the wrath of gods unleashed while a legion of angels cry with sympathy over our suffering. The worst yet I saw on the news was a van overturned by the force of the winds, beach fronts have to deal with waves 9 meters high....and flash floods arrived as unexpected as an annoying salesman at your door. My most sincere condolences to the families whose member got swept away by torrents of water.
Well, lucky for me that my place(It's called IBARAKI, please remember it and stop asking me where am I in Japan) usually escapes the maximum damage. BUT.....we may not have overturned vans.... but we do have our garbage bins overturned. Now this I can't understand, how can a garbage bin full of ...well, garbage...be overturned? Human waste can be very heavy and yet the winds decided to play a prank on us and spill all of our embarrassing secrets all over the yard!!

Sigh...but like they say, sun will eventually shine and brighten up our lives with it's abundant smile. But whoever said that don't know that earthquake can also happen in broad daylight!! Different from the honest, dark and moody rain, earthquake's like a hypocrite lawyer who smiles at you but then shake up sooooo bad...I have a friend up north where the epicenter was.....the same place I'm heading to next year. Thanks goodness he survived the 6.8 earthquake. 300 buildings were leveled....700 people died while 6 were injured....wait a minute...sorry, it's the other way round. But then again, at 6.8 anyone would expect that much right? Damn.....I chose the wrong place for a Uni.

Like I said, either god hates Japanese for some reason that only god knows....or that they drew a short straw a billion years ago. Well, at least the got the girls to wear miniskirts all the time so to convince people remain on this island.

I own a handphone....do I?

Haha...Chong Shen, you've finally become what I once was. Bordering between lameness and crapness. So, I suppose your friends now complain about your jokes being lame but miss you the instant you grow silent. You have come a loooong way from "Randy, can you be quiet? I'm trying to do my work here." You know, I can't help but think that you are some sort of my creation. Just like the mad scientist created Frankenstein. And speaking of ironically cruel twist of fate, I became you! Being quiet most of the time with a book in hand. I bet no one saw this coming!!!

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I assume that most of you own a handphone or mostly, your handphone own you. Have you ever been in a situation where you are out and realize that you left your handphone in the house? Then you just stop in your tracks and stand there thinking whether you should turn back to retrieve your phone or just go on (proves that you are dependent of your phone and that you can survive for one day without it). Well, it happened to me.

All my life....well, from age 17 anyway... I have been ignorant of my handphone, taking it for granted that it is just another accessory to decorate our already colourful life. I never took it too seriously....which practically means that I don't care too much about having a few scratches here and there. BUT...but never did I know, that once you buy a handphone, it possesses your soul and jealously cling to you, refusing to share space for any other thing. Much like the black stuff in Spiderman 3. Can't live without it, won't leave without it.

Yesterday, I was up at 6 in the morning, I had an appointment at 9 in Tokyo and the train ride there takes 2 hours. So, being influenced by the Japanese sense of godly punctuality, I arrived at the station at 6.40 to board a 6.50 train. And it was then when I realize...."Oh shit! I left my phone in my room!!" ....it takes about 30 minutes to make a round trip so it dawned upon me that I have either go through all the trouble just to get it, or "fuck it!! Who's gonna call me anyway?". Meaning to keep my appointment, I forget about the idea of having to cycle back and went on to board the train....NOT!!
You see, that moment, I realise that I'm one of the many suckers who couldn't bear THE BIG QUESTION OF LIFE. And that's precisely "Who's gonna call me??". With anxiety biting down in my ass, I cycled back with a hollow feeling knowing that My Phone Owns Me. Know what? They ought to name this as MPOM syndrome.....a message to the many philosophers who is still pondering the meaning of life, "Look in your gawd damn pockets!!!!!"

Sigh...so, yeah...my phone is the most important thing thing in my life. Lose my wallet, I still have money in my bank and I can always buy a new wallet....but lose my handphone, losing that contact list could mean the end of the world. Sigh...and double sighs....I guess that if anyone ask me to choose between my handphone and oxygen, I would no doubt choose the obvious one.............................oxygen....What? I know that it contradicts with the mood that I (deliberately) set for the this blog but, who on earth would choose handphone over breathing air? That's just plain stupid don't you think?


Well anyway, yeah....I'm a sucker and a slave to the most own electronic gadget on earth.

The joke that was (mis)understood...

Yeah...thanks guys. Really do hope that I will enjoy myself there...and not forgetting, hope that I will learn lots there.

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Know what's my favourite character in Pirates of the Caribbean?? No, not Elizabeth Swann (I do like her...A LOT... but not my favourite)....and definitely not Will Turner (I'm not gay.) So, is it Jack? Yeah, it's not him as well. So, that leaves either Capt. Barbosa or Kraken. So, I guess that many of you will guess Kraken since he's my far away cousin (for those who just knew me, I was nicknamed *Crab before)....and we spend most our childhood playing gasing and kejar-kejar....but, no to that as well. My favourite is Capt. Barbosa.

So, "Why Capt. Barby?" you might ask me. Well, here it is....remember part one where Capt. Barby was cursed, that no drink could cure his thirst, no women's flesh could warm (Yeah, not even Jenna Jameson) ...well, I was sort of cursed too and that struck me as a fair sort of similarity between us. My curse was that....as well known as I was for telling witty jokes and giving odd comments that so many people have been enjoying....I have never achieved the same glory in Japan. Any joke I told would be met with a stiff frown, every odd comment I give would tilt many heads along with a unanimous "huh?"....

For those of you in Japan, you might understand me when I say jokes originally told in English fall on deaf ears when translated to Japanese. And so I was cursed when I came upon the land of miniskirts. Every time I say something funny, it have been received with silence ....a silence as heavy as a plate of cold, unsalted noodles. And so I became quiet in class....I became the soulless guy who won't speak unless spoken to....in a state not quite dead but not exactly alive. (Capt Barby suffered the same thing ..)

But last weekend I rediscovered my gift. Long story short, all the foreign students went to a party where this one lady from London attended. I shall call her Anita (Didn't create it, she introduced herself as so.) Anyway, Anita and I were having simple, normal adult conversation about the food, culture, education system, politics...etc etc...when my dormant self awoken from extended hibernation. Even I, me, myself was surprised with the things I said. God knows (other than my own self of course) how much I enjoyed myself that night. Just by seeing other people laughing at my remark gives certain pleasure to me. Oh.....how I longed to be called Crap again! How I miss the times where people automatically smile when I approach them.

And then, I did something very brave...back in school, I tried telling my Japanese friends jokes again. With my new found confidence I told them a joke and guess what?.......They laughed!!......NOT!!!!! Once again I find myself in an awkward position of having to explain the stuff I said to them. THAT'S IT!!!!!!!!!! I'm never telling another joke to a Japanese ever again. I'm never gonna suffer that cocked head asked "What?" anymore...


*Crap:
Funny, witty stuff ...in shorter words, nonsense. I pretty much told lots of crap during my highschool days, hence the nickname Crap.