Say helloooo to beautiful!!

Allow me to introduce to you one of my many associates, colleagues and coolies in japan....THIS!!

This...is...i mean was a handphone a.k.a cellphone also as mobilephone....now, It's mine! It's my virtual flirting device...ehem..ehem...


so, what you guys think?? Actually the picture is just undermining it's beauty...it's screen is superb!! Beautiful sharp images that enhance the beauty of a beautiful girl projected on my beautiful phone on a beautiful day....ain't it beautiful?? The camera 's catagorize in mega pix....don't ask me how many Mega pix....don't want to make you all jealous. And please take a close look....



Yep....it says 3G!! Can anybody please tell my mom that I'm proud to own a 3G phone. Man, am I high tech....ehem....if you want to send me messages....send to randygui@ezweb.ne.jp ...it's my e-mail that send it directly to my beautiful phone.....



that's me saying hahaha to you guys.....hahaha

Okay...let's settle back down to planet earth. I got that phone for 0 yen......O YEN!! Can you believe it?? Went to participate in a survey that asks for my name, age, sex and address...and the survey girl gave me a smile and a handphone. Umm...if still remember, they still selling nokia 3310 for hundred plus rite? haha.....i can feeel the great envy generating from Malaysia....
Sorry...got carried away. NOW...let's settle back down to planet earth. One thing I've not noticed when i came here till just now that ... the sky is blue. Yeah...that's right kids, sky is blue. It's not like malaysia where there's cloud to look at..here, it's blue. Back when I use to see clouds, i entertain myself by imagining one thousand nonsense from the enigmatic clouds. Always knowing that there is something beyond and awe at infinity. Now it's just plain blue...romantic guys may say that it's romantic but, I see a big blue wall. The Great Blue Wall Of Japan..greater than Great Wall of China. I feel like a hamster living in a blue cage with a big brown and green globe to run on. feels.....i don't know the word...trapped maybe??
Anyway, another thing about japan....behold, there comes the uncensored newspaper. Uncensored here do not mean perverted naked pics of b***hes...If i'd want that i take a walk in Tokyo. The news paper here reports any damn thing they want. I've never read anything that insults Dear Mahathir or Pak Lah before....and of course reports that heavily criticise China during the relationship tension. They act as if they don't have a single clue why China is angry at them...acting innocent and all. All the reports on "China is Bad" stops only after Japan's PM says sorry to China. Now, papers are back to the everyday news of car bombs and derailed trains.
I'M having A DIFFICULT time making a living as a crap. Almost no one understands my crap save for my faithful mirror, laughing at any joke I make. I used to describe crap as factual nonsense....it's nonsense but there's facts in it. I think the real meaning of crap is the obscurity between facts and nonsense, vagueness between serious and joking.....I'm blur about the level of jokes in Japan. Once, this guy said he will watch porn during the holidays. I told him don't watch porn, that's right kids, don't. I gave him my reasons....uhh... the one about go get a real life girl instead if you have heard me saying it before. He reacted by saying I'm a pervert....ME! A PERVERT! me a pervert when he spend his holiday watching porn.
This section is dedicated for girls....pretty boys in japan are increasing their quantity and quality. Yep, quality. Was speaking to one pretty boy when he took fronm his bag a mirror...if it's just mirror, I'd tolerate but it's a foundation makeup kit cum mirror!! I ask him " What the HELL is THAT!!" he said, "this? it's foundation....." Hell, what's wrong with this guy!! Let's hope that I don't get converted.....nah, save it...let's imagine me being a pretty boy and laugh......
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.finished laughing already?

There's a pretty girl from MGS here in Japan...

yep...like i said it. A girl from melaka...was surprise myself when i found out....shocked even more when she say she's from MGS! here's her pic..



oh...go ahead, comment all you want. I'm sticking to my opinion...

Anyway.....I was surprised, shocked, scared my wits out of my now witless brains that......she's related to me!!! Serious, no crap man. She was making a bit fun of me being banana when I proudly told her that i can write my own name....sad case, yes i know but that's not the point. Wrote my surname and she said..."hey, my gramma have the same surname!" and that she's a hakka...same as me. wow...what are the odds that the only Malaysian chinese, a pretty one by the way, in the whole area happen to be from dear old Melaka......and is related to me!Sigh, talk about a small world. Anyway, I'm faster in calling her aunty than her calling me uncle........haha.
Anyway....i saw a pic of rendang that day and suddenly it's Niagra Falls in Randy's mouth, like Yellow river in China....nonstop flowing saliva. Damn I miss Malaysian food already. I'm seriously depress eating their food and drinking milk every damn day. It feels like 2 years already. You know, when I just came here, i was like ...Hell Yeah.....now it's looking at the timetable(holiday section) everyday and soothing myself that it's another second nearer to heavenly holiday and vestral vacation.
Here's a bit bout my class...average about 10 sleepy heads per period. One wake up and another fall victim to narcotic nap. lects seems quite ok with it..they don't care and keep on teaching. The guys behind me however found good ways to not fall asleep...they don't pay attention and have chat session. hmm....good idea.
That saturday, went to an international society or something like that where all aliens gather. japs who attend are all females...yahoo!
y = (why)
a = all
h = here
o = old
o = ones?
I'm okay with old ppl, i respect them and can chit chat with them but for a few hours...a few hours...they were talking bout their trip to America and stuff...maybe i'm just not interested....don't mean to be rude but at times fighting a losing effort not to yawn. That MGS girl seem to be digging their fabels but me......some of you mite say I'm a devil but would you rather me lying bout it?? see? They are nice ppl anyway, they were talking bout making a party for us aliens. Anyway, there a pic of me actually smiling... pls notice the ladies around me.

Para Para Sakuras....

Hah...finally get to borrow my seniors laptop, save me all the hardwork trying to flirt with the librarian....and finally know how to post pics....
so, as for starters, let me introduce the prettiest girl in my class....



hmm,...what you guys think?? haha, anyway let's say thanks to my good partner....hard to find, cost me RM2800 to hire him...but pretty good worker though



k,....these are the famous sakuras....i can still smell them..aaahhh








Kayyy, those were the "normal" flowers...let's see the "rare" flowers..




ehem....nice flower eh?? This flower was the highlight of the park....have to buy ticket to see this "flower"...heh heh....ehem ehem...

remember i mention some weird people there??






and remember the DJ who brought his stuff??


he said he's gonna do his stuff till the fat lady sings.....and he went back rite after that...pity him

k, the live performances there..


this one were singing boyband songs.....yuck!


...this one have tikus voice.. ..the very cute japanese tikus voice

and the rest ...the delivery bike, kancil and kelisa...haha, who said japs don't use malaysian stuff??





and... the bike everyone uses in japan. As high tech as these nimcompoops are, tghey still cycle ah soh, ah soh kind of bycicle....my grampa used to cycle this one too. This is the one thing that government forgot to upgrade....or are they trying to be world's 8th wonder??



This is my hostels and my table in my room....see? It's neat, tidy, spick and span, spotless and every other english word that rhymes with clean.
(A personal message to cheong, this look familiar?? haha)




And this is the club i have joined


....jealous?? don't be, That shit is smelly. had the sweat smell from a hundred barbarians. If they take DNA sample from this shit, I will show a few hundred jap.

As an apology for the previous oversized, eye straining, nonfitting monitor pics...




k, that should be it.....wait. as for dessert, let's see it one more time.



heh heh, definitely the cutest in my class

Wow, i can type so fast if i do handstand and type with my 8 legs!!

Pic?? Hmm....I'll try flirting with the girl librarian first...see whether can upload stuff using the library com or not...there i goo!!! Ehem...
K, k....trying my best to put pics....promise.
K, update about that girl. Just as i was reading my own previous blog...she was just behind me!!! Thank gawd that she is not that fast in reading english....phew. she would have cried with joy to know i use the word cutest, prettiest and smartest on her...god knows what would happen if she knew that...I? I don't wanna know. Anyway, i am wearing...for you guys, I was wearing just a plain T-shirt and jeans while all the doo-hickeys here wear 3 layers of clothing and a jacket. Don't know if i look like a clown but she came over and asked me if i'm not cold.....i said "well....." while showing all my machoness. she said "wow" and touch my hand, oops sorry, bad english...touch my arm, yep, finger till shoulder...arm and said "wow, you can stand this weather? Great!" .........heh heh..ehem, if only she was the librarian, i could have taken this PC home!!
This is a special message to kenny....if you ever think of pitying me, please read my previous post, look for sections where i mention me getting eyesore because of the miniskirt race.......there you go. Kenny, i pity you in Malaysia...haha.
K, some more news of me in Japan....It's been raining. It rained since yesterday noon...up till now, and the sky still full of juice. It's just light rain but it goes on and on and on...not like malaysia's short, heavy rain. It's like the X-Files....The Cold is Out There. I mean outside a building, there's the stupid, bloody depressing rain and there's the wind that tries to blow up girls skirts, but had to blow pass me. I PUT ON a jacket when I7m out...not crappy enough to just T-shirt and Jeans.
I don't know if i mentioned the food...if i did, skip this. If not...I eat at the Canteen here. Food here is NICE!! Fellas..don't eat jap food in Malaysia, and please don't patronize Sushi King cause' jap here say "What?? Sushi King? YOU actually WANT me to EAT that??!!" Food here is great but funny thing is.....they love milk. Bunch of clowns just love milk. They drink it Morning, Afternoon And night....and if they don't drink milk, they devour yogurt. Hmm...considering the population here, I really pity the cows here, don't they get a blister or something?. Did they extract DNA from a waterpipe then insert into cow? And I wonder if the cows here get an extra patch of grass if they work OT...i mean who knows?? Them hooligans would kill for a glass of milk.
Recently, i had a really, really bad dream....it's so bad that my head was funny and the room seem to be trembling.....hey! My head's NOT funny...IT'S AN EARTHQUAKE! It was shaking, my stuff moved left, tot it was bad decision and moved right again and left and right and left, jump a bit and left..shake it yeah! and right....if there was music I would have mistaken it for an aerobic lesson...... I wanted to savour my first quake experience in Japan but hey, it's still early and my pillow suddenly look so randy, seducting my desire for it...i slept on. heh heh....
K, uhh.....gotta go...got gathering. promise pics to come up soon.

Oh look! There's a lightbulb over my head!! I have an idea.....hey! damn, blackout...

I have a wonderful news....for myself actually but don't know if you guys are interested. The prettiest, cutest and smartest girl in class talked to me!! She actually came over to my corner and talked to me!! See, we were have p.e class and were shooting hoops...during that i encourage her to take a shot at the basket. she missed it but she was happy that she actually tried a shot...after that, back in class she said some jappy gibberish and the something like thanx...wow!
Okay, kembang enough.....
Hmm, on saturday, we all meet....we malaysian students all met at Shibuya, so-called city for youngsters. You won't believe how many people were there.....one word, shitload. Its like people mountain people sea.....gawd damn. hmm, wonder how japan can have so many japanese?? Their people must be very "hardworking"...working all the way from day to "night" !! Not to mention carrying a parisite for 9 months...I mean, do they actually give birth for fun??
Anyway, A friend of mine got cut off from the group and he became MIA.....he just mad a new hp but no one have his number...bummer. Told my senior to wait while me and another guy, Doink went for Ops Saving loke eng's private. Didn't know where to look for so i went back to the hp shop and ask for his number. Mission accomplished...private still strong and unharm. pity him though...he almost went back alone...kesian case.
Anyway, went there shopping....so many shops that have so many things. CDs, clothes, electrical stuff...Yes, chick shops with chick posters on display also. About shopping....man, if i live here It WILL be very hard to save money. Just that day alone i accidently bought a few shirts and a video cam....spent 1ooooo yen one night! Will be updating pics soon....
The next day, we went to harajuku...this place is famous for their weird jelly for brains nutcases....there's so many people putting on ridiculous, only seen in pc games kind of costumes....but they were like celebs though....everyone taking their photo. I actually hoped that malaysia will have such stuff, weird in a way, special in another. Was something nice to look at. Anyway, went in a park and I saw something that's more beautiful than my own mother......sakura! Althought it's just a tree with white flowers that's shy of green leafs.....imagine a place FULL of sakura trees...as you take a walk down the road you see flower trees everywhere...petals falling down like rain. And it smells of uhh....cherry and vanilla mix ...something like that. It's so beautiful...can't really describe it by words.
Nice place ....but then again there's the crazy people...one guy brought a turn table (the Dj device that scrathes records). highlight of the day was a bunch of guys who took of their pants to take a photo....one of them show a girl he have balls...as if she didn't know. And there's the mini skirt minority race...ouch! my eyes hurt! haha....i'm actually bored of looking at soft white legs covered with a short piece of cloth already. it's funny that even if the wind blows strong, it doesn't lift...even if on bycicle, the mini skirt just tease and flirt with your eyes..that's all. It's a totally different story if a mini skirter's in front when climbing stairs. Proud to say that i kept my head with me, applied my own nilai moral and look at how beautiful my shoes are...believe it or not up to you. Oh, quite a number of people doing live performance there too...cooool.
I left the park on my way home....reach the station and once again...shitload! Think sardines thank god they were not Japanese. Can't get in, can't get out...people just stare dumbly at each other at the entrance. I, on the other hand be a malaysian...i acted lost, went to a guard and he brought me all the way to the entrance, nice guy...feel bad to use him to potong jalan.. Yeah, i should stay in line and be civic minded but still i'm a malaysian...we potong rite?? Didn't want to be stuck there also.

...I think i typed too much. you guys wanted to read blog, not novel right? To be continued...

PS: MIA= Missing in Action
DJ=Disc Jockey
Prettiest & Cutest girl in class=The ONLY girl in class...and i have my own personal
comments on her and it's different from above.

I don't know what to put as a title...out of idea

K...today is thursday...for these few days, been on a make-a-friend-a-day campaign...i suck at day...can't seem to make 1!! ....I make a few a day.....haha. Jappos here are cold at first...serious iceberg kind when they see an alien with two antenaes. BUT, they definitely warm up quickly...had to make the first move, but then again I use to do that in Malaysia also so it's not quite a problem here...My classmates are all 18...so i lied to them that I'm also 18 so that they don't feel small. They all look more matured than they actually are. There's one girl in my class but she looks like a baby hippo...and she sits at the conner of the class so...hadn't had a chance to say "we aliens are peaceful, we mean you no harm" to her yet.
Joined the basketball club here...damn those jappo have good stamina!! I quit early and vomitted on my way home...they carried on playing 2 hours later...wow.
Classes are not bad....but i'm a lil' slow in understanding...not down syndrome but ...it's the jap words. Got good friends that translate every damn thing though.
Oh, for the guys....I'm still "Excercising my eyes ...sorry, adjusting my eyes to the horrible, mencolok mata, eyesore miniskirts. I hate to stare at them. Everytime i see i one I turn my eyes away....really.....but then there's another one so I turn my eyes back again..but that girl is still there...so I turn away again.......sigh...nowhere else to look. My eyes are actually suffering!! Really! I mean, ask any optometrist...do eyes sore if they stare and bulge too much??
K, gotta rush...sorry for the short story but gotta go play kendo...tell you all bout it tommorrow.

18 and above only...if not...blah, just click this!

Cold.....cold.....cold.........COLD!!....................cold.
Went out a few times and i accidently bought some sweaters on the way.
It's saturday....well, they tell me that only aliens have five fingers to sign something...they use a stamp. I now have a long stick, rounded at the tip like a ............well, stamp.
Free today so took a walk....a lot of pachinko shop with more nutcases. Can't understand the fun of rolling metal balls in a plastic contraption. I can understand if women want to play with those balls but the men....and there's more men playing balls than women!! No wonder Japan's population's sinking......what?? No, trying to say that they spend too much time playing pachinko than having XXX activcity, don't get me wrong.
Oh, the key board is weird... the normal qwerty but the other buttons are alse where...
Anyway, no CC's around here....it figures cause' most games are in english. They play arcade here. Saw a guy play the guitar and drum thingie....damn, how can he move his hands so fast?? Saw another game...an interesting one. Umm...U put cards on a table and it shows as a group of soldiers with spears on the screen, you move them towards the enemy gate and burn it down.....now that's real strategy! And then there's that guy playing with his bucketful of balls...hmm...
Toilets here....the squating ones faces the wall...uhh...selari to the door. and the sitting ones have warm seat and shoots streams of water to your asshole when you're done. No wonder Japs are so advanced...they even build toilet seats that aims asshole!! there's another button than aims at a place in front of the asshole......i better not say anymore.
everything is sensored....no switches...just walk in and "Let there be light!"
Food's here nice .... a lot alot better than those in Malaysia. Malaysia's jap food sucks!!
K....the librarian is winking at me....time to go to her.....to return the key. TO RETURN the KEY! Don't bother thinking something else...

Shocking culture shock?

What’s shitty about here is that clothes shop closes at 8! What the f***? Supermarket closes at 12 though. Pachinko is definitely the craze in town. Everyone’s nuts about rolling metal balls in a plastic frames. Women I can understand but men had a lifetime playing balls rite?

Sad case no cybercafe here. It figures cause games are English…young rascals here play the guitar, drum and tapping colorful buttons game very well. I mean very very well, extremely fast with their hands.

Oh, they sell porn mags for the price of 1.5L coke! Super! Bought one out of curiosity. Hmm….interesting…

One mangosteen for RM8, savvy? Banana for RM3….one lonely stick, savvy? Watermelons here are cute, size of a deflated volleyball.

Throwing rubbish have never been so hard. You have to separate everything. I look dumb standing there staring and actually think where to dump the dumb rubbish into the dumb dumpster.

One thing sickening about the jap is that they are so gawd damn freaking polite! Their politeness makes me more nauseatic than a boat can.

Jappos drink milk all day…milk for lunch! Pity the cows here…wonder if they get extra patch of grass for OT?

Homesickness...

Damn…totally lost track of what day it is. Lucky there’s the newspaper!

Today’s the day I found out the most beautiful thing is my family pic. Now that I look at the picture I realise how much I miss my home and parents…It’s only….what? 3 days? Can’t help it, almost cried when I called home just now. Yeah…lost all my machoness. Didn’t know that being far away could be so challenging.

Senior’s not so bad. The Vietnam Guy, Min is kind and friendly. The Malaysian guy is hopeless.

Shopping is terrible! Totally do not know what’s cheap and what’s trendy. So, decided to just grab what I want and regret later…bad plan huh?? Anyway, when paying the cashier will say out everything…your money and also balance. Hmm…the cashier at Narita’s cute though. And ah…it’s bad to convert over here…everything is gawd damn expensive after converting! About 6x Malaysian price.

Whatever that have been said about the heavenly jap chics is all so true! Saw a pretty one today but look bitchy . DAMN! And jap chics do not understand the meaning of cold when they wear mini skirt. Not that I’m complaining though.

About guys ….why the mop down hair? All not too friendly…is all I can say. Cheong should have not complained so much back in Kolej 2!

Oh yeah, about jap…cold! Only time I’m not shivering is when I’m in my own room…there’s a heater yeah baby…

Tokyo is a city like tall building all over. A lot of small restaurants everywhere…can only fit about 10 nutcase at one time. Food’s delicious..taste better than the one in Malaysia. Can survive after all.

And everyone seem to be participating in the national walkathon competition…rush here rush there. Traffic here is similar to Singapore’s My place is quite a small city..no tall buildings around. And soil-brains actually plant beside the road! Air here’s clean so there isn’t much prob I guess.

Crap's Siege in Japan 2

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! To myself...don't matter...celebrated with you fellas already. For those who missed it, aww...
Day 2. Have to leave at 7.20...woke up and...SHIT!! It's so sunny already! I'm late! or Am I not?? Hah?? What?? Only 5.45?? ...??? It's sunny at 5.30 also.
Went to Ibaraki....1+ hour away. my place is like Alor Gajah town....but pachinko all over. Went to buy my futon and went to register myself as an alien...yes, there is even an instuction leaflet bearing the word "ALIEN". They asked for my alien passport and where i parked my spaceship a.k.a UFO so that they can label it IFO and the military won't shoot down my spaceship.
Anyway, at the municipal...you should have seen that guy being polite to you..so polite that you feel nauseatic and puke. Also had a funny looking stuff called a heater...never seen it in my whole life!! but may god bless that guy who built this...cold..brr.
Went shopping ... had a bad time cause' how the heaven do i know what is expensive and what's not?? I just buy first and regret later....sob...sob....my small pack of milo cost RM18.00...boo hoo.
All those vestral heavenly jap chicks, sorry not seen one yet...it's still holiday at my place.
That's all....for today, not much cause just settled in and have to announce my alienship and that i do not have antennae sticking out of my head.