Job hunting in Japan.

When I first set out for Japan, I decided that I would finish my degree, then work in Japan for 5 years, then head back to Malaysia to finally enjoy a plate of authentic Nasi Lemak...

After my diploma, during my undergrad, I realized that "Shit!! I still don't know what I want!!". And it was either I start job hunting or pursue my masters.



My university offers a half year internship program for those who wants to do masters. Those who plans to stop at degree will have to write a thesis instead of the internship. I thought that the half year internship could help me figure out what I really want in life...so I registered for masters program.
If you are thinking "Why not do internship, then quit? That way, you can get your degree without writing a thesis AND you get to do the internship"
Well, that is possible but it would be messy...and it would hurt the chances of Malaysians who are trying to get into my Uni in the future...

Anyway, I went for internship...and boy, I made the right choice. I finally knew what I want...and I pursued masters.

Now, I'm facing what I avoided 2 years ago...job hunting.
And let me tell you...it's a pain in the ass!!


*Read in National Geographic kind of voice
(Job)Hunters on the prowl...armed with sharp pens and a hard folder, they pursue their prey from sunrise till sundown. These hunters usually dressed in their hunting attire when they go for the hunt...a pair of leather shoes, business suits and a tie. These hunters often stalk their prey for months before they attack. However, if these hunters fail to make the kill, many will hide in recluse...refusing to even see the light of day.

Job hunting in Japan starts freaking early...too damn early. Students here start job hunting a year and a half before graduation!! That's right, right after finishing the first semester after enrolling, you have to begin worrying about job hunt. What a load of crap...this practice pressures students to engage in job hunt during college and most will not get to experience a normal college's life.
What the hell Japan...everything is too early here. They can't wait for their fish to cook, they start decorating for Christmas in October, start job hunt more than one year before graduation, arrive 10 minutes before an appointment, ejacul....ehem, let's leave this part out.

In all seriousness, I think Japan have this practice because they have that tendency to begin everything in Spring, or early April to be precise. Companies and corporates all over Japan, even schools, have welcome ceremonies for newcomers in Spring. So, they selfishly wants to recruit by then. Since recruiting during the last few months in the final semester is just plain cruel, they decided to do the lesser of the 2 evil, begin recruiting a year before.



The process of job hunting here is:
1. Survey various companies or attend a job fair. Identify the companies you want to apply for.

2. Send in entry sheets.

3. Attend a special explanatory seminar in the head or branch office. This is usually done on business days. Yes, this means skipping classes.

4. Attend interview and exams.

5. Attend second interview.

6. Start working for them 1 year later.

Yup, 6 simple steps. Sounds easy...except that the whole process takes about 4~6 months!! And you are applying for dozens of companies!!! You can see here that job hunting in Japan is a waste of money and energy. If you are aiming for a job far away, well, good luck traveling 3~4 times there.

So, you can see here that with this amount of time and energy required, college students can't undergo a normal college life and that they can't concentrate fully on their studies. Furthermore, applicants are evaluated based on their past performance, not their achievements during the last year in University. So, that means that if you have a shitty record in your previous school, and if you can't get a job...you can do your best and be the best god damn student in Japan and still be jobless after graduation, just because you missed the job hunt window. What's the point of learning and maturing in University then?!!! Isn't that the point??

So, many of you asked, why does students in Japan sometimes commits suicide after failing a mere paper in high school??
Well, the answer is : pressure of society.
Society demands that we excel all the way...one misstep and your future is screwed. Such stress and pressure often push students over the edge when society should instead offer them a chance to improve.



Well, you can argue that students here commit suicide because of bullying. Yes, that's true but there are cases where a failed paper is the cause.

Recently, a bunch of students protested in Shinjuku, saying that they want to live a college's student's life. And that they did not enroll into college just to job hunt. Oh my heart goes for them...

But to be fair, there are a few of my Japanese friends here who say they like the way things are. They said that they hate spending time idling around for more than 1 week after graduation...now, this is the part where we all say "What the hell?!!"

So anyway, I'm job hunting at the moment. My choice of work will take me either to Aichi prefecture or here in Nagaoka. If I stay, well, I guess in 10 years I'll be the old one at the Uni's foreign students party....hahaha



Oh god, I wish I get a job here!!!

Happily ever after...

It’s all over the internet now so, this shouldn’t even be on my blog as everyone else have written about it...still, can’t resist giving my two yen worth of thought here.



So, a Japanese man marries his Nintendo girlfriend. Wow, I am jealous.

And why not?



She is cute, has big eyes(with an incredibly sexy mole under her right eye), perfect skin, boobs with a satisfactory size. She’s forever nice, never demanding anything more than a few strokes of the plastic pen on touch screen, never argues, always there when you need her to be, always “not” there when you need her to be, won’t date out in expensive restaurants ordering something expensive which she can’t finish and will later complain about, and won’t ask you why your neighbour has new furniture/TV/car/curtain but not you. She also has no need for a Prada bag or a dozen shoes.

Wow...why have I not thought of that sooner?? I could have married Tifa Lockhart from Final Fantasy 7 for strangeness sake. That way, if anyone tries to rob me...

“Don’t you know who I am married to? Tifa Lockhart!! She will kick your ass!!!
Now, can just wait for a moment while I switch on my Nintendo?”
Push start…loading…select character…
load game…tifa…tifa…I’m going to load my best weapon…
Emerald Gloves of Dread. Oh ho ho…you are dead meat now!”



Now, wouldn’t that be awesome!! hahaha...

But seriously, I don’t understand why the world is so interested in this one dude. People have been having strange marriages all around!! Married to chicken, a tree, a dead spouse(I do think it is romantic, but some things just aren’t necessary), a partner twice/half your age. So, what is it so strange about this guy marrying a virtual girl?

Instead, it kind of makes sense in a few ways...

For example;
If Tiger Woods had married a Nintendo DS, he wouldn’t have crashed his car into a tree.
Bill Clinton would not have lost his presidency.
O.J Simpson would still be a loved actor.
Chua Soi Lek would be filmed sitting on a couch holding a small size gadget instead of...you know...

Just so you know, it isn’t all that easy getting a virtual girl to marry you. You first have to get to that “Marry Me” button...and it takes a lot of patience to get that option to appear on the screen.
I myself have tried a dating simulation before and, GAWD DAMN it’s frustrating!! It is almost as troublesome as dating a real girl in life. The only difference being you can’t slap the girl in game.

So, I say we applaud that guy who pioneered the way for us. Lets give him credit for being brave enough to actually hold a wedding reception in Guam. Lets be thankful that he gave us something interesting to read about and something for me to write about.
I shall forever remember him as NDS Guy(not Nintendo Dual Sreen but, Nippon Dude is Strange)....

Hah...I bet Charles Darwin did not predict this kind of evolution for mankind huh?

Japanese Zen : Power of mind over matter...

I know that you all have the stereotype impression of Japanese; that they eat sushi everyday, and that everyone practices Zen. While the former is false, the latter is very much true. Japanese from various places and of various ages practices them, from farmers to city folks, from secondary school kids with Nintendo at hand, to old folks with walking stick at hand.

One of the more famous zen practices around is "mind over matter"...the one teaching we've heard over and over, but hand still hurts when punching a brick. However, just because we can't do it doesn't mean it isn't true. With enough dedication and willpower, it's amazing how you can achieve control over your body, enabling you to withstand pain, heat or cold. As far as I know, there's a particular group of people who have been very successful at this.


Having said that, I would especially like to focus on zen practices by young Japanese city girls.

Young city girls here wear the shortest of skirts/pants during autumn and winter. And after living here for 5 years, I have learned to stop asking "Are they not cold??" I've settled for the assumption that they all meditate for half an hour each time before leaving their houses, thus their superhuman ability of extreme cold resistance. If you have any other better explanation, please feel free to enlighten me.



Recently on the news, was a TV special reporting on how young Japanese girls no longer wearing just a mini skirt or hot pants, but paring them with leggings. This trend started only very recently but already with over 60% majority wearing leggings...this means lesser bare legs around, much to the dismay of boys who "appreciates beauty".

On a survey done, they asked these girls...."So, why leggings? Is it because of the cold weather?"

Amazingly, they expressed shock, then answered "Cold? What cold? Leggings are more fashionable..."

Chics and dudes, if only I can express my amusement here other than the usual "hahaha".

I could not help but laugh at their statement...I could swear that everyone in the cafeteria(was eating when I saw this) now thinks that Malaysians are crazy people. No other foreigners would have laughed hysterically at a TV report like that.

Randy is very sorry for causing a wrong perception towards Malaysians by the Japanese.

But how can I not laugh at that? I've known for years that they endure the cold winds just to show off beautiful slim legs, stare angrily at guys who ganders at them, then laugh happily among themselves in secret.
Now that they finally start wearing leggings, I thought that they have finally given in to Mother Nature...who could have known, huh...

On a different note, guys have started wearing leggings too...
Every time I see a guy wearing shorts with leggings underneath, it stupefies me to the point where I actually believed that leggings are meant for guys too....

Japan movie titles are hilarious!!

It has been a LONG time since I could sit down and write stuff. I was so busy with so much things...well, busy until I lose sleep every night but, writers would know what I mean. When you have many things to attend to, you just can't sit down and compose proper sentences.

Anyway, I just completed my biggest task yesterday...YEAH BABY!!!!

ehem...excuse me.

Now, on to today's topic...

Dudes and chics, I have been living in Japan for a long time. And there are many, MANY things here that you can always count on to put a smile on your face...

One of them is Japan movie titles...they are freaking hilarious!
So now you know why overseas movies take so long to show in Japan...they have to think of a funny title first!!

First off, let's start with the lame ones....


Disney's UP...
While UP sounds intriguing, Japan made it "Old man Carl's Flying House".
Well, it may be true. But to literally name it like that...lame...



The Proposal became..."You will be my groom".
Well, not exactly 'groom' but 'a guy who move in with his in-laws'....
Still....cheesy isn't it?

Now, as for my favourite title of the year,

My Sister's Keeper....
They renamed it "You Inside Me"...

Maybe it's just me but, sounds an awful lot like a sex movie don't it??

Bra for men?? Wtf??

Many prophecies have predicted that some kind of plague will mark the end of days...yeah, I know, Swine flu is out and about now. But I'm not ready to acknowledge Armageddon just yet...until I saw this.


Umm...what is that dude doing, holding his chest with a sad face like that.
And what's wrong with the mannequins? Did they run out of plasters to make boobs?
And why are those bras on display so small...wait...are they...no...no....NO WAY!!!
Those are men bras!!




Shit, the end of the world is truly coming....Yes, now they have bra for men and it's available in Japan.

I have no idea why they made bra available for men, but this is damn ridiculous.

I've seen guys sitting in front of the mirror setting their hair and trimming their eyebrows.
I've seen guys putting on foundation on their faces as they are "afraid of the sun" or "wants fair skin".
I've even seen guys going on strict diet just so that they can fit into tight pants.

But this....what the hell? Men's bra? Now the Japs have gone too far!!!


Aw shit, this have got to be the most disgusting piece of picture I've ever posted on my blog.

OKAY...let's be fair to those guys who "needs" them. These guys aren't exactly transvestite, nor are they some perverted cross dresser. They are normal, everyday office men. Report says that Japanese men have "requested" for them...asking why can't guys wear bra too. It supposedly have positive psychological effect...boosting self confidence and relieving stress. They are so popular that these men bra sold out on the first day of sales!! And I kid you not when I say, there are request for men bra in the US as well.

This thing isn't exactly new in Japan. The trend where men have become less "manly" started long ago. Many of the guys here are less aggressive, forgoing the masculine look and opting for a softer touch; such as trimming eyebrows, putting on make up, refusing to go out if they're hair/clothes aren't well done....some even refuses sexual relationship with women, preferring "self help" toys instead. In Japan, they are labeled as "herbivors"....as in harmless as a cow kind of herbivors.

See how scary Japanese lifestyle can get? You may have heard about the many suicide cases in Japan, but now you know to what extend the pressure and mental stress people face here. And to think that I MAY WORK HERE someday, this isn't encouraging at all...

Can you imagine...me putting on a bra before going to work? My thick, hairy arms reaching out to the back, trying to hook it in place?

Looking into the mirror, then smiling stupidly to myself....full of confidence with a red bra on my chest....

Can you imagine the sheer horror of that??

Someone please kill me the day anyone sees reddish strap beneath my white shirt....

Fall of a celebrity : Kusanagi Tsuyoshi

Yesterday, Japan witnessed the fall of a celebrity....

Ex-SMAP member Kusanagi Tsuyoshi was found drunk and hollering around at a park. Nothing wrong for a celeb to get drunk, right? Right, except that he was butt naked while he was at that!!

For those who don't know who the hell he is, here's a pic of him.



This guy could very well be the most famous guy in the whole of Japan. Well, after the recent scandal of his, he IS the most famous guy in Japan. Anyway, a brief introduction...

He is one of the 5 members of SMAP, a very popular group in Japan. So famous that not one self-respecting Japanese kid can't sing their hit songs. Other than singing, he's involved in various kinds of TV shows and also in advertisement, like the one above. He is also well versed in Korean and have done quite a few work there. He is well known for his easy going character...well liked by everyone, on and off the industry...

So, now you know that he is a very important figure in Japan. But last night, after a couple of beers and shochu, he got drunk...very drunk. Where the legal limit of alcohol for drivers is 0.15mg, his was tested to be 0.8mg!! He was so wasted that he stripped off his clothes and started shouting in Korean at a public park at 3 a.m. And he was violent too...at least I think he was, news reports that he resisted arrest and that they had to wrap him up in a vinyl sheet and shipped him to the station!!



Following the embarrassing arrest, advertising agencies and TV stations start canceling his shows and commercials. His career was over before he could pull down his pants.

Now, what interests me is that how eager Japan was to crucify this guy...especially one so famous like him. This is so different than America where you can be exposed for the skankiest scandal ever, and still smile for the camera the next day. Leak a sex tape...whatever, you'll get a bigger paycheck yet.

But here in Japan, where every must follow a certain rule...this one involves the rule where all famous people have the responsibility to portray a good image for the young generation to follow. Break it and you'll get the front page news.

So, learn from his mistake!!

If you ever want to go out drinking, make sure you drink A LOT till' you pass out completely! That way, you won't end up doing stupid things...such as a career suicide.

Japanese Gravure Idols....underneath all those greatness.

Today's attention is Akiyama Rina.....


No, her butt wasn't photoshopped....

Ehem....a pervert I am, but not just a pervert without an opinion. So, please read on...

Akiyama Rina is one of the many godly Gravure Idols in Japan...or you might know them by the term J-Idol. For those not living in Japan, gravure idols means Japanese models who primarily pose in bikinis and underwear(like above), whose sole purpose is to make men like me nose-bleed and slips into a hypnotic state and buy whatever magazines that have her on the cover... and let me tell you, it works. I have piles of magazine on my bedroom floor that I have no memory buying....

Scary, ain't it?

But seriously....no, they don't have hypnotic powers and I don't have a piles of magazines on my bedroom floor. Gravure Idols actually mean Japanese models who pose for photo spreads in magazines(comics mainly) and for photobook(a heavenly photo album of godly girls wearing provocative clothing). And while they are called models, they don't particularly model for companies to be used in advertisements. Their body IS their product....and that's what they are promoting. Just in case you are wondering, no, none of the pictures contain sexual elements, they don't do pornography.

And there's more than just having their pictures taken...

Take for example, Akiyama Rina, girl in the arousing picture above(Go ahead, you know you want to scroll back up). She is named to have the best butt in 2007. Jealous girls out there might think that..

"So what? Her parents gave her that...it's not like she earned it!!"

I thought the same too...until I came across this show on TV. The show was about her giving advices on how to make your butt look good. Yeah, I know....lol right? But after watching the show, I thought "Holy ass...I never knew that such knowledge existed!!!"

There's a whole list of do and don't, that these idols follow when it involves certain parts of their ASSet...Rina gave up some of her secrets of trade in this show....


ALWAYS wear a T-back underwear if you want to wear shorts. Avoid the embarrassing panty-line...


*Show's host starts listening intently...*


Always stand with your hips leaning on one side....it enhances sexiness


Left - Before..."wow, sexy"
Right - After... "OOooohh...se-x-ay!!


After lathering your face with facial wash...


Lather your butt cheeks next. ALWAYS treat your butt like it's your face....it's worth buying extra tube of facial wash. You will be rewarded a pair of silky smooth "cheeks"...
This somehow redefines the vulgar word "buttface"


Caption says "Sleep without your underwear"
Your butt spent one day being 'trapped', it's better to 'let it rest' at night...


The host can barely contain her excitement now....she was nodding and smiling all the way!!



And lastly, it ends with her giving advice on "exercising your butt"....the top being "walk your butt" and "butt-flex" on the bottom...

I don't know bout you guys, butt I find this amusing. Where else other than in Japan that do TV shows about butts? And where else other than Japan where real girls wearing real T-back appear live on TV??

Makes you suspect there's a Butt Faculty in some V-arse-sity somewhere..

In Japan, where gravure idols face somewhat fierce competition among each other, special measures are taken to maintain their Asset. Apparently, you don't get named Miss Ass-Japan 2007 just for being born with potential butts...you have to "develop" them....

I studied long hours to prepare for SPM, went through a lot of interviews, get Malaysian taxpayers to sponsor my coming to Japan, only to watch these kind of TV programs. Now, who said that this world isn't fair??

The all so amazing JK....

The girl in the pic is my girlfriend.....damn, wish I could lie better. This pic was taken from Danny Choo actually....


The term JK means Joshi Kousei (Japanese high school girls)....not Joking...or Joe King. The pic above is a typical Japanese high school girl in her uniform. And YES, their skirt is this short even when they go to school. Apparently, they get better marks from male teachers...Anyway, this post is not about beautiful legs under ridiculously short skirt. But read on...lols guaranteed.

Just this morning, while I was happily chewing on my piece of toast, one of the TV channel(forgot which one) showed the popular abbreviations used by JK lately....it was so gawd damn funny that I almost became the first human to die from choking on a piece of toast!!

I know that most of you only use the term JK or KY which means kuuki yomenai which translates directly to "tak boleh baca angin". Haha...we Malaysians have "makan angin" and Japanese "baca angin"....it figures, right? I mean, us Malaysians have always liked to eat and you can always see Japanese reading a book! But seriously, KY means can't understand the situation or being a wet blanket. KY seems to be the popular one at this time around but the ones on TV were the most creative thing I've ever seen in 2008.

Here's the list...

ATM = Ahona Tousan Mou iranai (Don't need my stupid father)
MM = Maji mukatsuku (Really irritating)
3M = Majide Mou Muri (Really can't do it anymore)
IT = Aisu(Ice) tabetai (Want to eat ice cream)
HD = Hima dakara Denwa suru (I called because I'm free)
MW = Mou Wakaranai (Don't know...)

There were a few more but I've forgotten them....sigh, should have wrote them down on my toast with strawberry jam....

Anyway, when I first saw them on TV, I thought it was just normal education stuff teaching English abbreviations....
ATM = atmosphere
IT = Information Technology
HD = hard disk
those kind of stuff, right? And that's when I saw MW....I thought it was some Abbrev. that I've never seen before, so I went to take a closer look. And that's when I saw the rest and that's also when I almost choke to death on my toast...

Man.....it's so funny I'm still laughing now as I type.

How to get an er(l)ection in Japan!!

>Li Yin
Of course I remember you!! How can anybody forget you? So, did you manage to get anybody jealous with that bookmark I gave you?? You know....the one with the cute little japanese girl on....anyway, great to hear from you again. Coming to Japan again soon?

>Kelly
No I'm not a clean freak.....I ate my share of dirt and junk throughout the year. It's just that my body have stronger immunity towards bacterias that gives you diarrhea....but it seems that even my body can't match up against the dirt Malaysians can produce...haha, hope the Gov don't sue me for this.

>Mayc
Yeah, I remembered the day I stared at my own stool for a full 5 minutes before working up the courage to reach in and grab some....yucks just thinking about it!

>Steve Lee
Umm....yeah, about the time we spent the night in Tokyo. That story never fails to amuse people.

>Ns29
Yeah....with that healthy body of yours, your body might have gone into shock from the diarrhea and could have died!! But then again, please don't hesitate to go next year...

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Erm, in case you are wondering if this entry is a sexual one, no it's not. It's just that being in japan for so long, I started to mis up the "r" and "l". What I meant was election....or was it erection? Anyway, it's the process of selecting a candidate for a certain responsibility by voting. Just for the record, I DID NOT, on any circumstances, do that on purpose just to get your attention....hehe...

Political representatives are once again getting their yearly erection in my region. And GAWD DAMN I've never been so irritated....

You all know that er(l)ection works best when you are popular and people know who you are or heard of your name. In Malaysia, we have the system where candidates travel from place to place holding rally talks...you know, the one where they stand on a stage to give speech about a bunch of sweet nothings. Always promising something well beyond their own commitment. "I'll clean up the place...I'll build a better school...I'll not embezzle..."Hah..makes me think that it's a politician's duty and responsibility to lie. If they can't lie to us, then they are not a suitable candidate for the job.

ANYWAYS, in Japan, they don't have such things as a 'rally talk'. Nobody knows why they don't...they just don't....damn, I wished they do. You see, the way they do it in Japan, the candidate sit on a little ass van...drive around town, blaring their own name on a big speaker and waving and smiling to practically no one. Come on dude....what the hell are you trying to do? Trying to prove that Japan's technology on loud speaker is good? YES, I can hear you a mile away but I'm still not voting for you so...SHUT UP!! And stop waving please....

For a country that tries its very best to preserve the peace and quiet of the neighbourhood, it's quite surprising that this kind of "sound pollution" is actually allowed on the road. Secretly, I suspect that they are blackmailing us that if we don't vote for that particular candidate, he won't shut up. But the again....can't they just use the Malaysian way of setting up a stage somewhere and make empty promises? Come on mister....Lie to me! ...lie to me, then leave me alone for the day!

Sigh...they do irritate the hell out of me, but at least they manage to amuse me in a certain way.

Have you ever seen a tired smile? I don't mean the kind of smile that you do 'after a long hard day, you're tired but manage a smile at the end' kind of smile. I mean the one where you 'smiled non-stop for a whole day till you tire your face out' kind of smile...it's pretty hilarious when you manage to get a good look at it. I could have swore that that guy's face was shaking all over!! Just like when legs muscles shiver after a long hard run, his lips was like, trembling....his cheeks was convulsing here and there....as if his face was begging.."Please!!!....please, no more smile...I....I can't take it anymore. ARGH...shit, he's making a turn here! Shit! he's gonna smile again.....NOOOOoooooo".

Haha.....must be tough going in to politics in Japan.

Buffet TV....An All You Can Eat Show.

>Peekaboo
Well, yes and no....I don't really know what you look like other than in picture you post on friendster. And if you say you put on that much make up for classes....damn, that's a lot of paint! Not sure bout everybody else but I prefer the al naturale kind of look. You look much much sweeter without make up. But hey...that's just me......hmm, no wonder that old man got attracted to you. haha...btw, all the best for your exams.

>Junnie
You saw my mom? Well, say hi for me the next time you do....and that sparkle you saw, that was probably because she spoke to me on phone the night before! Yeah, you got it wrong....my mom actually misses all those nonsense me and my bro made for her!

>Takumi
Heys....always nice to meet a new fella. I'll be posting those in November...

>Ncs
Actually, I sat in the front row. And it was kinda cool seeing it all close up front. Nausea? Well, that's because you got brain trauma from all those cool shit!! Even I got short term speech impairment from sitting in front.

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It's SUMMER time!!!

Just in case you thought that "!!!" was "Yay! it's summer!!".....no it's not. It's more like "Aww...shit! it's summer already??...aw man!!"
I HATE SUMMER!!!!!!

So why do Randy hate summer when 200 million fellow Japs love it so much?

Here's why....

It is said that crickets burrow into the ground for 17 years and then 'gloriously' emerge into the world of the living...proud of it's adulthood. And guess what crickets do to celebrate being an adult? They tell each other stories of their underground life....who they met...what kind of soil they were in...how they once broke curfew and went out to take a peek at the world before it was time. That's all fine actually...but do they have to shout at each other? Yeah, I know that they have friends from different trees, but do they have to chirp out that loud? Damn...someone get them a handphone!! Noisy little buggers.....waiting all those years just to come out and annoy me.

To make living with cricket all that much worse is the heat. Last I saw on the news, it was 41 degree Celcius. 41 for goodness sake.....and to pair up with that is 60% humidity. Gawd DAMN it's hot....it's so hot that I'm naked most of the time. Talking bout "living la vida nuda" (Pardon me if my Spanish is wrong but you'd understand nude when you see nuda right?). Sounds catchy right? Well, that's one song that even Ricky Martin won't sing about. Anyway...it's sweltering hot.
But then again, summer's not all bad. Went to the beach the other day...was great playing with waves and building sand castle...ehem, had a kid to do that with me...can't do that alone now can I? Sad right? Can you imagine a 22 year old guy playing with sand? Anyway, also tried to get a nice summer tan but got sun burnt instead. Probably from staring at the girl in white bikinis for too long. My skin is really paying for it now...I'm shedding skin like that snake in Anaconda, cept' I'm not getting bigger as I do so.

Oh...about the title. haha....almost forget to type in something about that.
Ehem....latest on Jap TV, a show about girls who can eat like a pig. Excuse me there...didn't mean to demean them like that.

The real stuff is an entertainment show about women who can eat more than a pig. I mean.....HOLY SHIT, she can stomach all that shit? Shit....
There's this one show, a girl as slim as Jessica Alba ate a 2kg piece of steak plus mash 'tatoes and corn and rice. In another, a girl who ate 3kgs of spaghetti....another who ate omelette rice...well, nasi pattaya...on a plate as big as a basketball rim!! What? Don't believe me?....haha, yeah, I've exaggerated a little bit there...it wasn't that big a plate, it was a tray.
I've never really understood Jap entertainment Tv but this is real bullshit. I mean I've seen a fat guy eat, but these girls can really eat more than a really fat guy. Damn girl just won't put her fork down. I'm no sport science specialist but eating that much isn't good for you right? Her body won't have enough time to process all those junk.

Hah...don't think her excrement will be brown in colour!!

The all so awesome Japanese...

Wow....it's really been three months since i last blogged?? I have been lazy for three months?? Only for three months?? Haha....just kidding. Anyway, gotta say i'm surprised that people still waste their internet time on my site (which hybernates during summer). Thanks fellas.....

+ + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + +

As I have said, I have been here and there breathing in air and mee goreng along with karipap and kuih koci. no, that wasn't crap....i mean what i said. You see, my eating speed have gone beyond "2 or 3 chews" ......beyond "don't bother chewing" and DEFINITELY beyond "Swallow first, ask question later". And since my vocabulary is pretty limited, inhaling seems to be the most appropriate word.

Anyway, what i was trying to say was...umm.......oh yeah, I was at a malay food stall the other day together with my old folks. As I was happily "inhaling" mee goreng, we met one of my dad's friend (a jap guy living in Malaysia) who was giving a tour guide to a bunch of Jap people. Sigh....why? why do they interrupt my feeding time with a barrage of bows??
Okay, imagine this.... A bunch of guys standing up and bowing to each other profusely while exchanging pleasantries in Japanese, in a malay GERAI!!! Bet none of you have ever seen the Mak Cik's facial reaction to this scenario. The mee goreng lady actually had to throw away her "hangus" mee and remake another plate of mee goreng (Yeah, she better quit staring and pay attention to her frying this time!)

Well, if that ain't hilarious enough, imagine what were their intentions of going there....
I'll give you a minute or so....
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.........ready? Got your imagination fired up??

Okay, here's what really happen. They went round the gerai looking at all the kuih, randomly pointing at them, and were commenting that they look cute (don't feel bad for the other kuih, they all got equal share of "Oh, look at this. this is soooo CUTE! Oh wait, that is even cuter!!"). After all that, they stood in line to take picture with Mak Cik. I must say, that Mak Cik was very talented with smiling the same smile for three different group of people.
After Mak Cik's brief moment of fame.....well, they bow some more (what else can you expect? They are Japanese) and left with smiles still glued to their faces. Just like that...."Say cheese, *snap* *flash*... keep that cheese, now say goodbye".

Amazingly NO ONE noticed that they didn't buy any food there until I commented.....my mum then added that Japanese tourists are so cute. That's right, CUTE!


PS: Should've brought along my vid cam....would've qualify for AXN's "World Most Amazing Videos"

Necktie crisis!!!

This is another wonder from eccentric Japan TV.

This afternoon, the local news "highlight" caught my attention while i was happily chowing unhealthy "ayam masak merah" that i cooked (it was actually edible!!) . This "highlight" was featured for quite a moment ... longer.... than any other news.

So.....

Is Japan in war? wrong, they were stripped naked by the US force....Earthquake? nah, a few broken plates and bones would too common to be news....Ice cube size of bricks came falling down? NO! It was a heated argument between a fashion designer and the prime minister of Japan.

An argument....to wear a tie or not.

Since it's autumn now, a fashion designer introduced "warm biz" which means "warm business wear" for working adults to cover their naked asses. She said that gents would look good and feel warm WITH a tie. Well, I don't know if the PM of Jap, Koizumi had grudges against that poor lady but he said, NO! No need for a tie....and actually MADE a press statement. He even appeared in a formal function wearing warm biz...minus the tie of course......
News then proceeded with featured interviews from folks around asking them whether they would wear a tie or not...complete with statistics and "necktie" forecast. Yup.....you heard me right, forecast!!!

I have been here for... what? 7 months already?....but still, I can't understand Jap's mentality. What's the big deal? What's wrong if us guys wear a tie or not? You don't need the PM himself to voice out his opinion on TV, right?

Amazed? So am I....

HG!!

HG stands for Hard Gay.
It`s one of Japan`s TV celebrity. For my buddies already in Japan, skip to next paragraph. For those who are not...well, Hard Gay (mentioned in the sports day blog) is a guy who wears a leather suit, chest baring tight jacket, short....very short, tight pants and a hat. He uhh...acts like a gay and his favourite is rocking his hips back and forth, and the all famous "FOOOOUUUUuuu " shout out.

Anyway, he calls himself GAY but i don`t think he understands that term well. Right just now, I saw his show on Tv. He was dancing to the song "STEP you" by ayumi hamasaki. He had a few other dancers with him and they are...female dancers!! clad with very sexy and revealing leather suit. and there`s one scene where he`s on a couch with his arm around a girl and he smiled very cheekily to the camera. Hard gay?? LOL.